千萬不要這樣認為。對此有所執著、老是想它，並沒有什 麼好處。你必須放下它。每件事情都會自然依循因果的律 則，多想無益，改變不了什麼。此生，如果你的家人對你 不好，那是你過去行為的結果或業債。我們必須為自己的 業負責，是我們為自己的一切經驗種下了因。敵人、作障 者、惡親戚等等，都只是緣，而不是因。此外，過去的已 經過去，不復存在，既然無法改變過去，就必須將它放下。 所以，別再想了，更重要的是握在你手裡的東西，也就是 未來。因此，為了確保未來的安樂，你應該生起慈與悲。 如果總是想著他人的過失，便只會感到憤怒和憎恨。應該 想著他人的功德，而非過失，如此就能讓愛生起。如果你 無法停止那些念頭，就憶念度母，並持誦她的咒語。

佛陀曾說：「自淨其意，是諸佛教。」佛陀並沒有說：「淨他人意。」你必須清淨自心。如果你一再攀執於憎恨和挫敗的念頭，就會形成習氣，而這種習氣將在中陰時以電視劇般的幻相顯現於面前，但其實它卻是你自心的投射。它是憤怒和憎恨的投射，也是成就地獄的因。放下它，並努力培養愛。你唯一應該把握的，就是愛。如此，到了臨終，你便不會恐懼，而將投生於上三道，並逐漸證得菩提。因此，不要憂心他人的過失，而要清淨自己的過失。

Do not think about things like that. There is no benefit in grasping and thinking about it. You have to let it go. Everything follows the law of karma naturally, there is nothing we can change about it by thinking about it much. If your family members treat you bad in this life, it is the result or karmic creditor of your own past actions. We are responsible for our own karma, we ourselves have created the causes for all our experiences. Enemies, obstructers, mischievous relatives, etc., are only conditions but not the cause. Moreover, the past is gone, it doesn't exist any longer, we cannot change the past, we have to let it go, so do not think about this. What is more important is that which is actually in your hands, the future. Thus you should rather give rise to love and compassion in order to ensure a happy future. If you think about others' faults you will only get angry and resentful. Think about their qualities and stop thinking about their faults, then love will arise. If you can't stop the thoughts, think of Tara and recite her mantra.

The Buddha said, "Perfectly tame your own mind, this is the Buddha's teaching." The Buddha did not say, "Perfectly tame someone else's mind." You have to purify your own mind. If you cling to these thoughts of resentment and frustration again and again, you form a habit, and this habit will manifest before you in the Bardo in the form of a delusive perception which is the projection of your own mind, just like a TV show. This is what creates hell, it is the projections of one's own anger and resentment. Let go of it and make an effort to cultivate love. The only thing you should hold on to is love. Then you have no fear when you die, you will be born in the higher realms and slowly attain enlightenment. So do not worry about the faults of others, rather purify your own faults.